Meet the Brobinsons – yeah, we know, real creative. Smash “Brooks” and “Robinson” together and that’s the best we came up with. Don’t @ us. For 20+ years this ragtag crew has been inflicting ourselves on the world, one destination at a time: Caribbean cruises, mountain hideaways, Disney (don’t judge), and now our latest crime against jet lag – nine days tearing across the pond through Italy, Greece, Croatia & Montenegro. The itinerary’s always the same: too much food, questionable decisions, ridiculously beautiful places, and laughing until somebody nearly gets us kicked out. Stick around. It only gets dumber from here.
Scott Brooks – aka “Rondo”
Owner of Scott Brooks Travel, LLC and the self-appointed ringleader of this whole circus. Rondo walks like he’s being chased – leaving the rest of us speed-shuffling half a block behind, wheezing and pretending we’re fine. Patience? Never met her. But here’s the thing: the man always knows exactly what to do and where to go, so we forgive the cardio. He plans, we follow. It’s not a democracy, and honestly, we’re better for it.
Suzanne Brooks – aka “SuSu”
Rondo’s far better half and the only reason this operation hasn’t ended in an international incident. SuSu travels prepared: a Ziploc for every snack, a pencil bag for every conceivable occasion, and somehow always the exact thing you didn’t know you needed. She’s the moral compass of the group – go-with-the-flow until she isn’t – and the steady hand that balances out Rondo’s full-speed-ahead. Just don’t look too closely at her bags. Rondo’s been known to stash “contraband” in there, and SuSu has perfected the art of innocent deniability.
Frank Robinson – aka “Franko”
The group’s resident neurodivergent clown and certified menace to good taste. Franko will make a joke out of literally anything – funeral, customs line, sacred historical monument, doesn’t matter – and follow it up with a comment that makes everyone glance around to see who heard. Selfie aficionado, serial complainer, and self-appointed keeper of vast reserves of knowledge that not one single person asked for. He reads things. He knows stuff. He will tell you about it whether you’re interested or not. Every crew needs one, and unfortunately for everyone, this one’s ours.
Kim Robinson – aka “Kimmy”
Franko’s far more patient other half and the group’s certified navigational hazard. Kimmy does not know where she is, where she’s going, or where she’s been – she could get lost on the way to the bathroom and somehow end up two countries over. But what she lacks in directional awareness she makes up for in vibes: reader of books, drinker of drinks, and SuSu’s partner in elite-level sun-lounging and people-watching. From “she should not be wearing that” to “that man is going to regret skipping the sunscreen,” nobody escapes the eagle eye. She’s even more go-with-the-flow than SuSu – completely unbothered by anything, as long as she can still spot Rondo somewhere on the horizon. Lose sight of Rondo and all bets are off.
Known Associates
The Kids — Logan Robinson (“LoLo”), Kaylee (Brooks) McCrimmon (“Onion”), Lauren (Robinson) Barber (“LaLa”) & Ryan Brooks (“RyRy”)
This crew’s been running together since the diaper days. From Ms. Pat’s to weddings to babies of their own, they’ve logged more years as a unit than some of the adults have. Split them down the middle and you get two very different operating systems: one half runs on photos, selfies, and an alarming amount of coffee. The other half runs on food, questionable hygiene, and the kind of behavior that ends with underwear stretched over somebody’s toothbrush. We won’t say which is which. You’re smart. You’ll figure it out.
The Outlaws
Levi Barber — aka “Whole Ass Nap”
LaLa’s other half and a man of many trades, most of them gloriously specific. Levi makes molds of folks’ teef and turns them into custom gold grills — yes, that kind of bling — alongside a side hustle empire of collecting money, selling gold, and making babies. He’s also locked in an ongoing, unexplained war with his own footwear, because the man cannot seem to hold onto a pair of boots to save his life. But his true masterpiece, the achievement that earned him his title, is the Whole Ass Nap: not a catnap, not a quick recharge, but a full, committed, lights-out hibernation, preferably executed somewhere in Statesboro, GA. A specialist in a world of generalists. We salute him, quietly, so as not to wake him.
Raegan Brooks — aka “RaeRae”
RyRy’s bride and the only person on Earth who’ll eat mystery fruit straight off a random tree right alongside Franko — a bond forged in questionable decisions and zero regrets. Proud daughter of the legendary “Felonius Ed,” serial killer of innocent succulents (no plant is safe in her care), and a devoted collector of all manner of artsy-craftsy junk. Her tastes are simple and consistent: big trucks, big men, and anything she can glue, paint, or hot-glue-gun into existence. A chaotic good addition to the crew, and exactly the kind of energy this family runs on.
Nathan McCrimmon — aka the Bug Man
Onion’s other half and the freshest face in this clan of misfits — still new enough that he probably hasn’t fully realized what he married into. Unorthodox, unruly, and thoroughly tattooed, Nathan keeps the bugs at bay for a living, which makes him the only Brobinson whose job comes with a spray tank and an arch-nemesis (it’s roaches). Every family needs new blood, and this one showed up covered in ink and completely unbothered. He fits right in.
Mackenzie Churchwell — aka “Mack”
LoLo’s future bride and quite possibly the most outdoorsy member of the whole operation. Mack is a certified foodie and adventurer who’ll snowboard down a mountain one weekend and be elbow-deep in it at the hunting club the next — she hunts, she fishes, and she is absolutely not afraid to get dirty doing either. Off the trail she’s a devoted hoarder of mismatched socks (a system, surely) and a fierce defender of the quesadilla as a legitimate meal for any occasion. Tough, fun, and game for anything. She’s going to fit this crew perfectly.